I am constantly moving at a fast-pace, checking off my To-Do List, and trying to conquer the world… or at least my world. Ah, who am I kidding, I am one of those girls who wants to rule it all :) But I digress. 

There are so many things I want to do in life and with my life. I want to be an excellent wife, a superb mother, an incredible cook (that one ain’t ever going to happen), a healthy and fit woman, a titan of my industry, a well-respected and wise woman, an author, a speaker, a motivator, a woman who inspires others and spurs change. I want lots of things. The list goes on and on. So I go at it and attempt to get to it every day. Tirelessly striving to reach my goals and always feeling like I am coming up short. 

Have you ever felt this way? 

You try and try and try (and then try some more), but you end up feeling like it’s just not enough — you’re not enough. I feel this way on the daily. I don’t feel good enough, smart enough, wise enough, equipped enough, educated enough, disciplined enough, old enough, young enough… The list could go on and on. I feel tired and overwhelmed just typing those words out!

So, how, then, will I ever be/accomplish what God has called me to? In Lysa TerKeurst’s book Finding I AM, she tells us “we cannot do what God has called us to do without Him.” Jesus put it another way. In the Bible in the book of John, He says “I am the true vine, and my Father is the gardener” (John 15:1).

This phrase always peaks my interest. Jesus is a vine. Not just any vine. He is the true vine. And God the Father, He’s the gardener (I can just imagine Him with gloves and a gardening hat on like my Papaw) But what does this really mean, Jesus? What are you talking about that you are the “true vine”?  I, unlike the Father, am no gardener. I would love to be (add that to my list above), but I’m just not. So this whole “vine” stuff doesn’t really come easily to me. 

So I started digging. I studied this phrase a bit more and tried to understand better what exactly Jesus was saying here (thank God for online commentaries, am I right?) According to Thayer’s Greek Lexicon, the vine is talking about grapevines (most of you are probably thinking, “duh, Gabbi”). It states that the “vine imparts to its branches sap and productiveness, so Christ infuses into His followers His own divine strength and life.”

This is so encouraging to me. I don’t have to worry about not being enough. I don’t have to worry about not having the answers or having the strength to carry out all of the desires of my heart, because that is simply not my part or my place. Jesus is the true vine. He is the one from whom all of these resources come. 

He goes on to say in the book of John, “I am the vine; you are the branches. If you remain in me and I in you, you will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing” (John 15:5). All of those desires of my heart that I mentioned earlier, all of those things and worlds I want to conquer — I can’t. Not by myself anyway. He said “apart from me you can do nothing”. That means that all of my striving and stressing and running around like a chicken with it’s head cut off is all in vain without Him. 

And that is not discouraging to me at all. 

Rather, it’s freeing. No longer do I have to carry the stress of that around with me. It’s not about me and my own ability. 

It’s not about whether I am enough. It’s about the fact that He is enough.

I simply have to remain in Him. I have to spend time with Him. I have to spend time in His Word and speaking to Him and listening for Him. He will do the hard part. He will provide the sap, the life and resources to grow. He will provide the strength for me to do my part. And when it comes time for me to take a step, I will. But it’s not up to me to provide the resources. That’s His job. It’s not up to me to take control of every situation so that I can make things happen. That’s His job. 

I have to know my place and my part. I have to realize that when I’m participating in the rat race and feeling exhausted and not enough and overwhelmed, perhaps it’s because I’m not remaining in Him. Perhaps it’s because I’m trying to do my part and His. That’s when I have to take a step back, cancel the rat race and simply abide in Him. Trust Him. 

As long as we are intertwined, I will produce fruit. And in that truth, I find rest. I find freedom.

Do you?